Choose Discipline

Dear Conscience,

This day is off to a good start. Now, it’s too early to tell if it’s a fluke, or a result of my efforts. In any case, this new “choose discipline” method is at least giving me insight, even though it’s still to be seen how well it’s working.

So, I have my little notebook (the thin pocket-size moleskin) with squares. All throughout the day, every time I make the disciplined decision (e.g. open my email and start responding), I draw a circle in a square, and every time I forego discipline (e.g. I open the news when I’m not supposed to be on a break), I draw an X in a square.

At the end of the day, I count the circles and the squares. If there’s more circles, the day was GOOD, if there’s more Xs, the day was BAD. However, I also keep track of the total number of circles over time, as my goal is to reach 1000 circles. So even those circles on the bad days count. This way, even if the day started badly, and accumulated too many Xs to outweigh, there’s still motivation to add a circle there. So far, I am on 33/1000. A long way to go 🙂

The ultimate goal is to have the daily circles outweigh the squares by a lot, ideally at least 80/20. That would be a GREAT day. I haven’t achieved that yet, but I know it takes work to get there. I feel that I’m getting insight and becoming more self-aware through this practice. And at least if I do procrastinate, I’m very conscious of it. Because I realize that it was a decision, it didn’t just “happen to me”.

I’ll still try it out for a while, if it sticks, I’ll get better insight into whether 80/20 is a good target, or should I adapt it. I do think it’s important, at least for now, not to aim for PERFECT days (with only circles). An X here or there is only human. As long as I choose discipline more often than not, I am doing OK.

Sincerely,

B.