self-help
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Writing Forces Me to Be Honest to Myself
Dear Conscience, Writing to you really helps in stopping me from lying to myself. Somehow, it’s easier to lie to myself than to lie to you. I had started writing at first on a completely different topic. But as I went on, I realized that I was just trying to pat myself on the back Continue reading
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Sleep Rhythm and Midnight Habits
Dear Conscience, I am rethinking my evening and night planning, so as to take into account my ”sleepiness waves”. Basically I would like to have an evening routine, and my intention is for it to happen after I put my daughter to sleep. However, often I get sleepy and fall asleep together with her. I’ve tried Continue reading
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Fear of Pulling the Plunge
Dear Conscience, I am dealing with the unpleasant topic of sorting my finances these days. Only now that I’m faced with the topic directly do I realize the level of my discomfort. I made some progress in terms of taking stock of my savings, and making a plan of moving them out of just sitting Continue reading
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Getting Trapped in the Yo-Yo Effect
Dear Conscience, I am mentally better, but already seeing how that causes me to relax my discipline. And despite feeling less desperate emotionally, it doesn’t mean that I can automatically afford to relax. It’s a yo-yo effect. I get myself into a bad state, which first causes me to despair. Then it motivates me to Continue reading
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Clear Floors
Dear Conscience, Today I avoided most of my to-do list in favor of doing one task properly – clear away all the mess covering the floors in our apartment. I opted for storing (i.e. hiding) it away, basically shifting the mess from the floors, to the closets, shelves and cupboards. I know that this is Continue reading
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Fixing, Maintaining and Living Life. All at Once?
Dear Conscience, Yesterday was a decent day. I’ll ascribe it to moving my To-Do list, planning and studying to my new digital notebook. Of course now, I have to make sure that my life doesn’t get taken over by planning. While I was happy scribbling away and crossing a few things off of my to-do Continue reading
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I Wrote This By Hand
Dear Conscience, I splurged and bought a digital notebook. I love it! I hope it helps me with organizing any notes, lists, habits, and life in general. But I also know this might have been an excuse just to buy it. l’ve wanted this for a long time. I love the feeling of writing on Continue reading
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Time + Money
Dear Conscience, Yesterday was a good day. Not perfect, but decent. I dipped my toe into my second big theme after Time, and that’s Finances. Even though it wasn’t a graceful planned dip, but more of a panicky rush to cool off a burn. I think my 2 days of anxiety pushed me into needing Continue reading
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Personal Finance Baby Step: Earn Interest
Dear Conscience, I continued this morning to take some steps around my finances, after taking stock of my checking accounts yesterday. Unfortunately I live in a tricky jurisdiction (a small country with limited options in terms of financial and banking products), so I spent more time than necessary to find out an option to move Continue reading
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Finance Check-In (11P.M.)
Dear Conscience, It is 11pm, my last check-in with you today. I haven’t done great. I did some minor tasks that needed to get done, but I didn’t do any substantial work today. I did take some time to take a step back over the root cause of all this anxiety spiral: my finances. I Continue reading
About Me
I got my first nickname when I was 4 years old. It was “bakitza”, which means ‘an old lady’. I’ve always been an old lady on the inside. And as I progress towards being an old lady on the outside too, I want to take control of this journey. To reach the full fledged bakitza level with a peace of mind I always associated with that life stage. I thought it would come on it’s own with age. But now I realize that I have to take control over the mess that my life currently is in order to be a thoroughly satisfied bakitza one day.
Becoming Bakitza 