procrastination
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Slump Under Review
Dear Conscience,I am yet again, for a gazillionth time, working on digging myself out of a slump. As always, it includes going back to following my 3 basic rules, plowing through a backlog, while balancing the storm of to-dos in front of me. I’ve done this several times now since I started writing to you. Continue reading
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It Starts With Sleep
Dear Conscience,When I try to get back to life after such a big slump as recently, I have to start at the beginning. And the beginning is to get enough sleep. Among the many bad old habits I re-adopted recently, was delaying going to sleep in the evening. Given that I have to wake up Continue reading
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Remember Me?
Dear Conscience, Remember me? I haven’t truly been talking to you for several weeks now. Maybe I’ve checked in here and there, but I haven’t completely revealed myself. I was hiding because I was sad at first, and later embarrassed. The sadness gave me the excuse to let go, and I let go completely. I Continue reading
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I Don’t Like My Family… Doctor.
Dear Conscience, I am self-medicating. I haven’t been able to breathe properly for weeks now. And yet, I am not taking the step to visit my doctor. I don’t trust my family doctor. She is old, and has misdiagnosed both myself and other family members plenty of times now. Which probably means that I should Continue reading
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Crawl Out of a Lull
Dear Conscience, It is time to slowly but steadily get out of my lull. But the trick is to do it without putting so much pressure on myself that I break down under it again. Yesterday I did a very basic brain dump of all sorts of to-dos. Today I didn’t look at the list Continue reading
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Uneasy Slumber
Dear Conscience, Trying to get up, but I can’t find my feet. Maybe if I stop burdening myself with the guilt of inaction, it will become easier to move. Sitting in the park, my daughter sleeping in the stroller, enjoying the breeze. Sincerely, B. Continue reading
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Determination Missing
Dear Conscience, Tomorrow I need to summon my determination. It’ll have been a full week of just floating wherever the stream takes me, back to my old ways. I need to start swimming towards the bank before I reach the waterfall. Sincerely, B. Continue reading
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How Many Times Until I Learn?
Dear Conscience, This morning I took the excuse of my client being out of office to take my meeting slowly. It started with wanting to watch the new episode of John Oliver. But it hadn’t come out yet. So instead of just going back to work, I found that Jon Stewart is back on the Continue reading
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TGIF
Dear Conscience, It is Friday. I am ending the work week feeling slightly more accomplished than usually. But my focus today was wavering. And while thinking through what was causing this urge to procrastinate, I realized that it was Friday. Friday was causing it. Friday is rarely a deadline. Often I feel that emails sent Continue reading
About Me
I got my first nickname when I was 4 years old. It was “bakitza”, which means ‘an old lady’. I’ve always been an old lady on the inside. And as I progress towards being an old lady on the outside too, I want to take control of this journey. To reach the full fledged bakitza level with a peace of mind I always associated with that life stage. I thought it would come on it’s own with age. But now I realize that I have to take control over the mess that my life currently is in order to be a thoroughly satisfied bakitza one day.
Becoming Bakitza 